2002-09-15T17:16:00.000-07:00

In the original Star Trek series in the City on the Edge of Forever episode, Edith Keeler whose pacifist views would one day form much of the basis of the Federation had to die so that she would not change history by delaying United States entry into WW II, allowing Germany the time to create an atomic bomb and win the war. What is not known however is that in the year 2002 AD a descendent of one of Edith's distant cousins by the name of Cindy Keeler would carry on her work, add some viewpoints of her own and influence history from that point on. Today, the BloggerRabbit Television Network presents STAR TREK: Alternate Timeline

Captains Log Stardate 2473.1 After awaiting for its arrival for 3 months we have received the reaction to First Officer Spock's recommendations concerning modernizing the training of on-ship security forces. It was the express opinion of StarFleet that training our security teams to do anything more than to lift up their hands and yell AAAAHHHHHHHHGGGGG would be unduly provocative towards alien races. You know for a logical being Spock sure cries a lot. Ensign Janice Rand walked in wearing half a burqua and a miniskirt. Muttered something about Shaaria and Nielson Ratings and left.

Captains Log Stardate 2473.3 We have received word from the Federation Bureau for Hazardous Wastes that our dilithium crystals are considered hazardous if we should crash into a planet and are demanding we remove them immediately. Engineer Scott and Science Officer Spock both concur that since we are an interstellar vessel we do not go close enough to a planet's gravity in order not to be pulled down toward the planet. Its been standard StarFleet practice since the beginning. They further agree that if we should remove the dilithium crystals at this time we will not have the power to stay out of the planet's gravitational field and would in fact then crash into the planet. Being only the captain I decided to let StarFleet make the command decision.

Captains Log Stardate 2473.4 StarFleet after consulting with civilian members of the Federation have decided to remove the dilithium crystals from our engines. We have complied. Uh-oh Red Alert.

Captains Log Stardate 2473.5 On the express advice of Engineer Scott and First Officer Spock we have petitioned StarFleet and the Federation Council to allow us to reinstall the dilithium crystals and prevent certain destruction of ourselves and the people of Rigdor 9. They have refused. The Council's conclusion is that the opinions of Engineer Scott are not credible given his failure to keep the Enterprise from its current peril. For a logical being Spock sure spends a lot of time hitting his head against the wall and screaming Why!! Why!!

Captains Log Stardate 2473.6 A renegade team of security officers have seized command of the engineering section. Engineer Scott says he was forced against his will to reinstall the dilithium crystals. Oh well. First Officer Spock is currently punishing the security section by forcing them to undergo a year of unpleasant weapons training, unpleasant hand to hand combat training and a general denial of their inner child. Serves them right!

Captains Log Stardate 2473.7 We've accepted the Fubarians into the Federation in place of the less compliant Vulcan. I will be getting a Fubarian First Officer. They were previously denied entry into the Federation because of their lack of technical knowledge and human rights issues. They complained such criteria were discriminatory. We agreed. Fubarians should do well in our society.

Captains Log Stardate 2474.1 The Klingons have begun offensive actions against us. Starfleet personnel are currently examining themselves and confessing what they have done to make alien races angry at us. Phew! It's a lot. Just verbally resisting the Klingons makes them madder. I have currently advised StarFleet that our mere presence in this star system may offend the Klingons and that we should redeploy at an area that is less offensive to them. StarFleet agreed. I then mentioned that since unilateral appeasement of alien beings was so central to Federation policy, I should get a raise in pay grade for not even considering engaging the Klingons. StarFleet agreed to that as well. For a logical being Spock sure says a lot of gutter Vulcan. Jealous Git!

Captains Log Stardate 2475.5 The Romulans have been incensed at our favoritism of the Klingons and who can blame them. They are demanding that we hand over the planet Vulcan since they are related races though distant. The Federation is definitely considering this move. With most of our Starships in full retreat to acceptable sectors the Klingon's advance has slowed to a more leisurely pace, validating our strategic policy.

Captains Log Stardate 2475.9 Giving planets to the Romulans angers the Klingons who assert and reasonably so, the planets belong to them. What to do. What to do. Here's something. I'm ordering a squad of hyper-sensitive Betazoids to give anger management classes to the Klingons and to teach us how to not offend the literally thousands of alien races who we seem to increasingly offend. They are all demanding that their legitimate claims to Earth as their home planet be recognized.

Captains Log Stardate 2476.4 University teams of ethno, mathematical and biological historians have in fact also come to the conclusion that Homo Sapien claims to Earth are mere propaganda. At the very least they are unduly planetistic and racist. As a sign of good will I'm removing all weapon systems from the Enterprise. Got a message from Klingon Captain Kr' uug Laak. "Thanks for removing weapon systems. Finally somebody understands how upset we get from the presence of Starships. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You, Homo Sapien scum."

Captains Log Stardate 2476.6 Never have I been more morally offended. Spock has left this crew without leave. He secretly transported onto a Vulcan ship and is going back to Vulcan to help with the Vulcan defense efforts. How dare he!! How dare they!! After all we've done for them. They talk all the time about logic this and logic that. Now they alone defy Federation wishes and engage in an imperialist, unilateralist and provocative strategy. Is that logical? Its unbelievable! I'm recommending the Federation declare war on the Vulcans. I've had enough of them and Spock.

Captains Log Stardate 2477.1 Need to reinstall weapons systems in order to attack Vulcan. Need to get permission from the Klingons to reinstall weapons and maybe even the Romulans. I don't want to make too many command decisions (bad for the career you know), requested consult from StarFleet.

Captains Log Stardate 2477.4 With the help of the Ligerians the Mantorians of the Visinik star system were overthrown and divided between the Ligerians and the Klingons. The Mantorians were Federation members but it was felt that Federation members who continually requested we go to a wartime footing were poor Federation members indeed. Klingons promise to fully and peacefully integrate the Mantorians into they're culture. They have selected many of the females to begin internships in Klingon society. The Klingons are alright.

Captains Log Stardate 2477.8 Romulans attack Vulcan. Vulcans repel Romulans with the help of dissident Federation and StarFleet members. Spock is promoted to Admiral. What kind of garbage is that? Spock outrank me? I even beat him at chess. Things just get worse and worse when people don't respect the Federation.

Captains Log Stardate 2478.3 Klingons are demanding Vulcan. We replied we are considering attacking the Vulcans ourselves due to their disregard of the Federation and interplanetary law but we have already promised them to the Romulans when we win. Klingons reply on what grounds? We reply that the Romulans are physically closer. Klingons reply not since they took over the planet Mantoria. They're closer now. Got to hand it to them. They've got us there.

Captains Log Stardate 2479.1 Great News!! As one of the few remaining Starship captains I've been called to the Klingon High Council in order to discuss my future. Maybe I'll be promoted within the new Klingon Council. I'll even outrank Commodore Spock. Its about time I got mine.